day sixty-seven

I cycled to the office this morning — second time since we’ve been sentenced to working from home. it was a good ride. nice temperature. not too many people

I remembered the song ‘don’t miss it’ by James Blake. and watching the video for the first time. on the mobile screen, as intended. we were supposed to see him live in April. we also missed seeing Rex Orange County and TNGHT. minor inconvenience in the grand scheme of things. but for a moment it came to me that it’s important to feel some sort of loss. express some grievance. have a tiny episode of grief

then I remembered to heed the advice of the song. or at least what I take from it: don’t miss the moment. and then it was all around me. the beauty of this city. I laugh at people who say Berlin is ugly. I don’t care about living in a “pretty” city. I want one with beauty hiding in the details and tiny quirks. I want to work for finding beauty. maybe find it where others may not see it. so that I then value it even more

in the evening we watched the final episode of The Last Dance. I appreciated a remark about Jordan, saying the real difference about him is that he is always present. I totally see how that contributed to his success. and I also see how my brain running ahead into the future or back into the past takes away from mine. not for long